Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Performance enhancing air

This post talks about farts. If you don’t like talking about farts don’t read it. I don’t intend to be funny either. Well… not completely.
I got this email today:

From: Martin
Sent: Tuesday, 22 June 2010 2:05 p.m.
To: Carl;Valentino; Gordon; Cyril, Daniel
Subject: RE: Luna H

I kept getting my timing wrong last night - I was only farting on the way down the hills - I needed the boost on the way up !!!!!!


From: Carl
Sent: Tuesday, 22 June 2010 02:04 p.m.
To: Martin; Valentino; Gordon; Cyril; Daniel
Subject: RE: Luna H
a huge amount.......and after last nights run session i know he eats alot of beans as well!!!
i kept hearing him this morning counting up to 1000.....must be doing huge reps

As you may guess… It turned out that the nacho’s night we had on Sunday (good Argentinean friends leaving for a holiday) and the leftovers I took to work had helped me through the day’s workouts. I excelled in last night’s hill repeats thanks to the propulsion I got.

So I decided to do a bit of research about the matter. I got into a couple of forums about the subject and they all agree that it is not banned by ITU, so I am happy I can use wind as a secret weapon. Then I found a website that has all the answers.

It appears that the average person has about 14 episodes a day. And the chances increase as you have more and more of the “hard to digest” sugars, beans are well known for that. But another “hard to digest” kind of sugar is Fibre, that is actually indigestible. So fruits (apples specially) are to be avoided 3 hours before workouts if you want to be a well respected guy/girl in the training squad.

More interesting is the fact that most of the guys I asked say that running is the discipline where they have the noisy episodes. Probably because is the last leg of a race, or because of the positioning of the body, who knows.
Lastly, I heard of one case of a guy who farted on his wetsuit, and this was the result.

Happy training everyone… and watch what you eat.

Date: 21 June
Sport: Swimming /// Running
Time: 55min /// 65 min
Dist: 3.2km /// 9km
Comment: running high on beans.


  1. Triathlon is an individual pursuit, so happy to keep eating apples. If I ever get into the peleton though, this is sage advice.

  2. I like my space on the course and so far an apple 30 minutes before the start has worked wonders!

  3. ha ha ha... it looks like the mighty apple has a lot of defenders